THE IDIOT WHO GOT THE BEST RESULT (Part 1)

An idiot got the best result? Very strange; right? I’m sure you are wondering who the idiot might be.

See, I was the IDIOT. I was an idiot all through my JSS classes. But most people who knew me back then thought I must have been very brilliant. You know why? I was always carrying books with me everywhere I went. 

In fact, some parents even advised their children to become like me. But I knew who I was. I hated books. I hated reading. I hated my school teachers. And worse, I hated anything called assignments, tests and exams. Exam was always very frightening. Why wouldn’t these teachers just leave us alone?

Although I carried the books around, nothing was really in my head. I was an idiot, you see. Reading notebooks and textbooks was a very boring and difficult task—not fun at all. 

So I carried the books with me in the evenings and on weekends pretending to be going to the library or a friend’s place to study so that whenever I returned from playing with my friends on the street and my parents asked me, “Etim, where have you been for the past 3 hours?” I would tell them I went to read and showed them the books.  

Funny. Smart kid!

Because if I stayed at home just to play my video games or just chill, everybody would be yelling at me, “Go and read your books, go and read your books!!!”

And I hated hearing such. Why can’t they just leave me alone? Read book, read book!

Very boring thing.

Even if I managed to read because they forced me, I would still not remember anything during tests or exams. So what’s the need?!

So to be smart, I would take my books outside, not to read them, but instead to play games, listen to music, play football and just being naughty with my friends on the street. 

Anyway, I managed to pass and got promoted from JSS 1 to JSS 2 to JSS 3. During tests and exams, I would stretch my neck and copied from anybody around. I was one of the worst students in class. 

Each time the class teacher gave us our report card at the end of the term, I would feel my heart beating very fast in fear because I knew what I would score.

Poor grades. This subject: Red ink; that subject: Red ink. Only a few blue ink.

They used to call my report card rainbow sheet. I always wondered how I managed to pass Junior WAEC. All I know is that, I found myself in SSS 1. They said I passed Junior WAEC. 

My academic performance continued like that one term after another until SSS 1 third term. To make matters worse, I went to Science department because we felt that was where the brilliant students should go. Meanwhile, nothing was in my head.

My first term and second term results were not good, as expected. I had been a below-average student for too long. But we had new classmates now. You know, in SSS 1, everybody goes to different departments and you now have new classmates and some former classmates. 

And again, I was still the Olodo (blockhead).
I was ashamed. 

Imagine the English teacher asking you to kneel in front of the whole class in SSS 1 because you couldn’t give one example of an adjective—senior student for that matter; in front of other boys and (fine) girls. 

Shame.

So at the beginning of third term, I decided I wanted to be different. I wanted to become one of the best students in class but I didn't know how. There were many of my colleagues who were far better than me. Some of them were exceptionally brilliant. And our teachers loved these ones. Every student wanted to associate with them. They seemed to know everything. How did they do it?

I was challenged by how they usually answered questions in class, and always got everybody clapping for them. I wondered if they had two heads. But something happened along the line that changed me.

I will tell you the story in Part Two.  

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